Annales of Volusis, shitty papers,
discharged a vow on behalf on my girl
for she vowed to the holy Venus and Cupid
that if I had returned myself
and if I had stop hurling vicous iambs (verses)
she would give the most superior writing of the
worst poet to the slow footed God
to be burned on unfortunate wood
And the worst girl sees herself
to vow this all in good fun with the Gods
Now o goddess born into the blue sea
who is holy in Idalium and Urium
and you who are worshipped at Ancona
and full of reeds Cnidus and Golgi
and Durrachium the shop of the Adriatic
enter the vow as recieved and discharged
if it is not uncharming nor is unattractive
and you meanwhile come in flames
full of countryside and courseness
Annales of Vouluisis, crapped on paper.

Annales Volusi, cacata carta,
votum solvite pro mea puella.
Nam sanctae Veneri Cupidinque
vovit, si sibi restitutus essem
dessemque truces vibrare iambos,
electissima pessimi poetae
scripta tardipedi deo daturam
infelicibus ustulanda lignis.
Et hoc pessima se puella vidit
iocose lepide vovere divis.
Nunc o caeruleo creata ponto,
quae sanctum Idalium Uriosque apertos
quaeque Ancona Cnidumque harundinosam
colis quaeque Amanthunta quaeque Golgos
quaeque Durrachium Hadriae tabernum,
acceptum face redditumque votum,
si non illepidum neque invenustum est.
At vos interea venite in ignem,
pleni ruris et infacetiarum
annales Volusi, cacata carta.