|Posted on Wed Sep 30, 2009 11:50:26|| |
Let me tell you, it's hard to choose which is worse:
(Smellwise) Aemilius' arse or Aemilius' mouth.
Thinking about it, I prefer the arse -
Because it's safer, it has no teeth.
Unlike his mouth. Oh, his mouth...
Teeth as long as a very long word, stick out of gums
like the frame of a rotten cart.
And all of it sagging open, like the gaping cunt
Of a mule, pissing in summer. And yet,
You should see how many women he gets to shag!
He's a real charmer, despite being fit for the knacker's yard.
Honestly, some women would suck the arse of a hangman,
|Posted at Sun Oct 04, 2009 15:28:09|| Quote|
Not sure where the diarrhoea came from! The poem's disgusting enough as it is.
Here's my attempt (metre is elegiac couplets).
I didnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t think it mattered (the gods love me!) whether
I smelt AemiliusÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ gob or arse Ã¢â‚¬â€œ
the gobÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s in no way cleaner, the arse no dirtier Ã¢â‚¬â€œ
but, actually, the arse is cleaner and better:
itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s got no teeth! The gobÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s got one-and-a-half feet teeth
the gums, in truth, of an ancient dung wagon,
besides a gaping maw such as the parted cunt
of a pissing mule in the heat is accustomed to have.
He $#$%s many girls and considers himself alluring Ã¢â‚¬â€œ
why isnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t he consigned to the mill and ass?
Any girl who touches him Ã¢â‚¬â€œ may we not think she could lick
the arse of a sickening executioner?