|  | 
  
  | 
 
 
 | Author | Message |  |  | | | Posted on Wed Sep 30, 2009 11:50:26 |  | 
 |  |  |  | Let me tell you, it's hard to choose which is worse:
 (Smellwise) Aemilius' arse or Aemilius' mouth.
 Thinking about it, I prefer the arse -
 Because it's safer, it has no teeth.
 Unlike his mouth. Oh, his mouth...
 Teeth as long as a very long word, stick out of gums
 like the frame of a rotten cart.
 And all of it sagging open, like the gaping cunt
 Of a mule, pissing in summer. And yet,
 You should see how many women he gets to shag!
 He's a real charmer, despite being fit for the knacker's yard.
 Honestly, some women would suck the arse of a hangman,
 With diarrhoea.
 |  |  |  |  |  | -- mym
 www.druidic.org
 | 
 |  |  | | | Posted at Sun Oct 04, 2009 15:28:09 | Quote | 
 |  |  |  | Mym 
 Not sure where the diarrhoea came from! The poem's disgusting enough as it is.
 
 Here's my attempt (metre is elegiac couplets).
 
 I didn’t think it mattered (the gods love me!) whether
 I smelt Aemilius’ gob or arse –
 the gob’s in no way cleaner, the arse no dirtier –
 but, actually, the arse is cleaner and better:
 it’s got no teeth! The gob’s got one-and-a-half feet teeth
 the gums, in truth, of an ancient dung wagon,
 besides a gaping maw such as the parted cunt
 of a pissing mule in the heat is accustomed to have.
 He $#$%s many girls and considers himself alluring –
 why isn’t he consigned to the mill and ass?
 Any girl who touches him – may we not think she could lick
 the arse of a sickening executioner?
 
 Carmen 97
 |  |  | 
 | 
 |  |  |