|Posted on Thu Nov 26, 2009 00:21:11|| |
|I'd like to place suggestions concerning one of the translations provided in your website, carmina 81.|
More specifically the first version in Brazilian Portuguese (see the Forum post "First version Brazilian Portuguese 81") made out of it has little in common with its counterparts. The greatest discrepancy shows up more clearly when compared with the english translation.
Therefore i'd like to share with you my (hopefully better) adaptation:
NĂŁo poderĂˇ haver ninguĂ©m em meio a estas pessoas, Juventius/NinguĂ©m tĂŁo bom a quem
comeces a gostar,/AlĂ©m deste convidado teu, mais amarelo do que uma estĂˇtua coberta
em ouro,/das redondezas do mortal Pesaro/a quem te agrada agora/
a quem vocĂŞ se atreve a preferir mais do que a mim/e fazer sabe-se lĂˇ o quĂŞ com?
From my perspective, this poem expresses not only "male bonding" but also implies jealousy and possessiveness. This feeling is what lacks on current version (along with three or four words).
Pedro Camargo, 26/11/2009